Habits

Habits make or break a person; you are either darling of everyone or a terrible person.

Have you ever thought of the fact that when we discuss “Habits” we always mean to pinpoint the negative traits of people only? Why we are always judgmental on dark side of people, and quick in making comments too? Can you remember a gossip when it started on passing positive observations and ended up in praising the people discussed about?

Generally and holistically speaking there are two kinds of habits; those that we acquire (intentionally or otherwise) with the passage of time from our upbringing, our company of friends and relatives, circumstances, and those that we inherit or draw naturally. Some of the habits falling in each category are given as under:

Acquired Habits

·         They are twitter worms.

·         She’s texting crazy gal.

·         He’s a chain smoker.

·         He’s a drug addict.

·         She talks incessantly.

·         My wife is extravagance.

·         Bosses are assertive.

·         Our maid wastes too much water.

·         Office driver is nuts; drives very rough.

·         He’s a bad mouth; speaks disrespectfully.

·         They eat a lot.

Natural Habits (Traits)

·         She’s temperamental, egoist.

·         He snores.

·         He sports a harsh look on his face.

·         She’s shy.

·         She’s beautiful but speaks hoarsely.

·         This kid is too stubborn.

·         That toddler baby cries all the time.

·         I’m not a courteous fellow.

·         He’s a soft spoken and smiling person.

·         That guy looks ugly.

·         Hey, you bald!

·         She’s rude and arrogant. 

Acquired habits consist of both good and bad ones. It’s always important and preferable that one is able to delineate the bad ones and do efforts to get rid of them before letting people target you and be critical of them which would eventually place you in an awkward and embarrassing situation. It’s imperative to stoke your good habits in order to enhance your character and personality.

One can’t do anything about the traits that come naturally. Some with strong nerves and commitment may get rid of some undesirable habits but it’s never easy. For instance, I sport a kind of weird and callous look on my face most of the time that I get negative remarks about them. I want to shun away it but in spite of trying (not hard) it’s not easy to put a smile on my face, unnecessarily. I rue it, nevertheless.

We come across many a people at campus, work place, neighborhood, shopping malls, and even in family /relatives and friends that we become judgmental of them instantly. We don’t like their personality (height, complexion, hairstyle, clothing, stern look, accent, eye contact, etc.). But it often proves us wrong about them once we get into conversation with them or spend some time with them. I know everyone must be having some gem of friends who possess ordinary looks and traits but since they are friends, all of their weak personality spots go in hiding and they never poke your mind.

Sometimes a person communicating in a normal tone may be taken as an impolite and inconsiderate for their haughty stance to the receiver but that’s way they are. Once you get into camaraderie with them you will soon discover that their hearts and souls are made of diamonds and pearls.

The natural personality flaws are very delicate things. They are not habits. People own them very seriously. You just can’t ask a girl /woman that she is arrogant, fat, with big nose, and that she speaks in masculine tone. Similarly, never ask a man that he is short, bald, and untidy or stutters while speaking. These things are always hurting. You will lose friends if continued making such comments and remained judgmental.

We must strive to steer habits, especially the undesirable ones. Habits controlling and dictating us will bring disastrous results. Stay caring, soft spoken, humble and empathetic. Also, be noncritical and non-judgmental to win lasting friends.